Pick 'Em Corner - The Professor's Smart Money Picks, the Most Wonderful Time of the Year Edition

The Professor is busy this Christmas season, buying gifts for all his contacts within the college football world, so no long breakdowns for all the bowl games. I mean, from Hayden Fry to Judd Heathcote to Gerry Dinardo to Ron Mexico, The Professor has a lot of shopping to do. Plus, do you have any idea how difficult it is to shop for that thing on Frank Beamer's neck?

So, without further ado, it's The Professor's Smart Money Picks, the most wonderful time of the year edition, brought to you by the city of Chanhassen.


Fresno State -10.5 Wyoming (NEW MEXICO)
Let's get the bowl season off with a bang. You hear that sound? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr-plunk! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr-plunk! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr-plunk! It's part 1 of 2 The Professor's Statistically-Proven Locks of the Week, brought to you by National American University!

Rutgers -2.5 UCF (ST. PETERSBURG)
My heart says Rutgers, but The Professor wouldn't be The Professor if he picked with his heart.

Southern Miss -3.5 Middle Tennessee (NEW ORLEANS)
Seems every year Southern Mississippi puts on a show in their bowl.

Oregon State -2.5 BYU (LAS VEGAS)
OSU's Mike Riley is 5-0 in bowl games. Done.

Cal -3.5 Utah (POINSETTIA)
When you lose to Washington and end up here, you don't have much to play for. Go Utes.

Nevada -15 SMU (HAWAII)
The June Jones Homecoming Tour won't result in an SMU win, but a cover.

Ohio -2.5 Marshall (LITTLE CAESARS)
The Bobcats won nine games, Marshall won six. That's my rationale here.

Pitt -3 North Carolina (CAR CARE)
The 'stache was a measly one point away from a BCS game. Tarheels, beware the 'stache.

USC -9.5 Boston College (EMERALD)
That's a lot of points for a bowl game, but BC disappoints annually in their bowls.

Clemson -7.5 Kentucky (MUSIC CITY)
That's just way too many points for a team as inconsistent as Clemson.

Georgia -7 Texas A&M (INDEPENDENCE)
Stay far away from this game. This has shootout written all over it.

UCLA -3.5 Temple (EAGLE BANK)
Thanks for playing, Temple. Here's your complimentary Eagle Bank savings account.

Miami -3 Wisconsin (CHAMPS)
Love the feel-good pick of the Fighting Steve Stellars over the Loathsome C-Noth's.

Bowling Green -1.5 Idaho (HUMANITARIAN)
I've got nothing here.

Arizona -2 Nebraska (HOLIDAY)
Limit turnovers, Cats, and this one is yours for the taking.

Houston -4 Air Force (ARMED FORCES)
It would border on sacrilege to pick a non-armed forces team in the Armed Forces Bowl.

Oklahoma -8 Stanford (SUN)
I've had terrible luck picking against the Sooners this season, but I just think Stanford has enough to keep this one close.

Missouri -6.5 Navy (TEXAS)
If you haven't figured it out yet, The Professor always picks the service academy.

Minnesota -2.5 Iowa State (INSIGHT)
I'm only picking The Professor's Father's squad in the hopes that a Cyclone win will spell the end of Brewster's tenure in Minny. Sadly, I think he'll get an extension before he finds a way to be out-coached by whomever it is that is leading ISU these days.

Virginia Tech -4.5 Tennessee (CHIC-FIL-A)
That thing on Frank Beamer's neck trumps Lane Kiffin's hot wife.

Auburn -7.5 Northwestern (OUTBACK)
Can't believe I'm making this pick, but the Cats are just plucky enough to stay within 7.

Penn State -2.5 LSU (CAPITAL ONE)
Comment withheld in deference to the Cornerman.

West Virginia -2.5 Florida State (GATOR)
I don't care that this is Bowden's last game. He won't know where he is anyway and WVU is miles better than FSU.

Oregon -3.5 Ohio State (ROSE)
The Buckeyes' woes in BCS games continues. For shame, Tressel, for shame.

Florida -10.5 Cincinnati (SUGAR)
That's an awful lot of points to give a Bearcat team in full "F You" mode, but it's still Cincinnati against The Almighty Tim Tebow.

South Florida -6.5 Northern Illinois (INTERNATIONAL)
This was my second lock of the week, until I looked a few games down at the Suspended Spartans vs. the high-flying Red Raiders.

South Carolina -4.5 UConn (PAPA JOHNS)
Mmmmm, pizza.

Ole Miss -3 Oklahoma State (COTTON)
I'm done with you, Oklahoma State.

Arkansas -7.5 East Carolina (LIBERTY)
Woooooo! Pig! Sooie!

Texas Tech -8 Michigan State (ALAMO)
You hear that sound? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr-plunk! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr-plunk! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr-plunk! It's part 2 of 2 The Professor's Statistically-Proven Locks of the Week, brought to you by National American University! My thanks to the multitude of suspended Spartans for handing this one to me on a silver platter.

TCU -7 Boise State (FIESTA)
I really like the Horned Frogs, but this one has all the makings of a classic, back and forth game between a pair of teams looking to prove a point to the nation.

Georgia Tech -4 Iowa (ORANGE)
I've been riding the Ramblin' Wreck bandwagon all year and I'm not stopping now.

Central Michigan -3.5 Troy (GMAC)
If a bowl is played in the midst of all the BCS bowls and no one watches, does it actually happen?

Alabama -5 Texas (BCS NATIONAL CHAMP)
When the second-best team in the state of Texas is playing in the national championship game, you don't pick said team to stay within 5 of ROLL TIDE TURKEY!

The Professor's Smart Money Picks, the most wonderful time of the year edition, brought to you by the city of Chanhassen.

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah (that's for you, Stellar) and a Joyous Festivus to all of those involved with Pick 'Em Corner.

Pick 'Em Corner - The Professor's Week 12 Smart Money Pick

Wow, the Big Ten season ends and so does The Professor's success in picking games. Coincidence? I think not. At least the betting public can rely on The Professor's Statistically-Proven Lock of the Week, brought to you by National American University (now 9-2).

This is a big week for The Professor. Anyone who knows anything about The Professor knows he loves the service academies. And thanks to The Host, that love gets to be displayed each week on Pick 'Em Corner with The Professor’s Service Academy Game of the Week, presented by Armed Forces Network.

Some might think The Professor would have a hard time picking this game. I mean, each week The Professor steadfastly picks the service academy squad, no matter the matchup or spread. So, how will The Professor be able to choose between a pair of service academies? Easy, that's how. The Professor loves the nation's service academies, but he loves one much more than the rest.

No institution in the country can match the history and tradition of this service academy. It's alumni include Ulysses S. Grant, Dwight Eisenhower, Robert E. Lee, Stonewall Jackson, Douglas MacArthur, George Patton, Buzz Aldrin and Norman Schwartzkopf. That's a badass list of grauates, if you ask me.

Its football program has won three national championships and has had three Heisman Trophy winners and 37 consensus All-Americans. Meanwhile, the other two service academies, combined, have one national championship, zero Heisman Trophy winners and 28 consensus All-Americans.

This pick is an easy one. GO ARMY, BEAT NAVY.

Pick 'Em Corner - The Professor's Week 11 Smart Money Picks

The Professor should know better than to trust anyone else with his Smart Money Picks, especially in a week all but devoid games involving the Big Ten. Instead, The Professor decided to give thanks to his loyal assistant, The TA, by giving said assistant some input into last week's picks. A 7-13 record ensued. The TA has been summarily dismissed.

This week, it's nothing but The Professor, for bettor (pun intended) or for worse. So sit up straight, sharpen your pencils and enjoy the lecture, for these are The Professor's Smart Money Picks, brought to you by the City of Chanhassen.

OREGON -9.5 Oregon State
Now I know Oregon State has been a pleasant surprise and, like you, I'm just glad we won't have to see USC in the Rose Bowl again this season. But need I remind you what the Quack Attack did to the hated Beavers last season? A 65-38 drubbing, that's what. Various experts around the country are calling for a Beaver upset (insert Tiger Woods joke here), indicating that the OSU defense should be able slow down the potent Oregon offense. I, for one, ain't buying the hype. The Ducks will score points in bunches and the Beaver offense just isn't explosive enough to keep up.

CENTRAL MICH. -10.5 Ohio (MAC CHAMPIONSHIP)
The Professor knows absolutely nothing about Ohio aside from their respected sports management school and their shocking 2000 win over the Goof Troop. Do the Bobcats still run the quirky offense that befuddled Glen Mason and Friends at the Metrodome? Anyone? It really doesn't matter. The Chippewas (that's not hostile nor abusive, per the NCAA) have Dan LeFevour and an offense that has scored 30 or more points seven times this season. Quirky Bobcat offense or not, LeFevour and Co. will rack up the points all day long.

Houston -1 EAST CAROLINA (CUSA CHAMP)
I know, I know. Defense wins championships. From what I hear, East Carolina is the defensive team, while Houston is the offensive team. So, go with the old mantra of defense over offense, right? Wrong. I'd pick the Pirates if their defense was really as strong as all the experts say, but one look at the numbers says otherwise. Houston has the top-ranked offense in all the land. ECU has the 68th-ranked defense. Houston has the top-ranked scoring offense in all the land. ECU has the 31st-ranked scoring defense. Houston has the top-ranked passing offense in all the land. ECU has the 86th-ranked passing defense. Am I missing something here? No, I'm not.

West Virginia -2.5 RUTGERS
The Professor hasn't been high on West Virginia this season, but the past two weeks have changed my mind. The Mountaineers made Cincy nervous two weeks ago, followed by a 19-16 upset of Pitt last week. Rutgers, meanwhile, got trounced by Syracuse two weeks ago. What more needs to be said?

PITT Pick Em Cincinnati
I've been on the Cincinnati bandwagon all season long and I'm not about to jump off now. Rumors persist that Brian Kelly will be the next Notre Dame coach, but methinks that decision has yet to be made. The Brian Kelly Big-Time Coaching Gig Audition hits Pittsburgh this week and it won't be pretty for the 'stache. In fact, do you hear that sound? Eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr-plunk! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr-plunk! Eeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrr-plunk! It's The Professor's Statistically-Proven Lock of the Week, brought to you by National American University!

ILLINOIS -1 Fresno State
The Ron Zook Postulate rears its ugly head one more time this season.

BOISE STATE -47.5 New Mexico State
The Professor got beat by another big spread last week after picking TCU to cover the 43.5 over New Mexico. Will he make the same mistake again this week? Probably.

USC -7 Arizona
It's The Host's Does Anybody Outside the Locales of the Two Teams Involved Actually Care About This Game? Game, Part I

Florida -4.5 Alabama (SEC CHAMP - NEUTRAL SITE GAME)
The Professor could give a lengthy lecture about the most anticipated game of the season, but instead he'll join the hordes of media who have endlessly tongue bathed Tim Tebow over the years. Tebow is the X factor here and, for me, Bama was less than impressive last week in the Iron Bowl.

California -6.5 WASHINGTON
It's The Host's Does Anybody Outside the Locales of the Two Teams Involved Actually Care About This Game? Game, Part II

CONNECTICUT -7 South Florida
This game should otherwise be known as the Cornerman's Home State University vs. Steve Stellar's Childhood Vacation Destination University Bowl. I'll take the Cornerman's squad for reasons unbeknownst to me.

Texas -14 Nebraska (BIG 12 CHAMP-NEUTRAL SITE GAME)
I don't care how good Nebraska's defense is alleged to be. They play in the Big 12 North - more or less the equivalent of the mediocre portion of the Big Ten (I'm looking at you, Minnesota and your bottom-half bretheren). Plus, the Huskers lost 31-10 to Texas Tech. That same Tech team lost 34-24 to Texas. Hook 'em Horns.

Georgia Tech -1 Clemson (ACC CHAMP - NEUTRAL SITE GAME)
Talk about an anti-climactic conference title game. Both of these squads were embarrassed last week. Looking ahead to this game or not, Clemson looked much worse against South Carolina than Georgia Tech did against Georgia (even if that game was at home). Plus, The Host loves singing that Ramblin' Wreck song.

Wisconsin -11.5 HAWAII
The Professor loves wrapping up the week with a feel good pick.

Thus concludes The Professor's Smart Money Picks, brought to you by The City of Chanhassen.